I’m so proud of myself!!
I have officially begun my Book of Shadows!! This has been something I’ve been excited about doing for well over a year now and finally the time is right to begin! I’ve gathered materials and been ruminating about what I would like said book to contain.
Recently I started a list of items I’d like to include.
It filled up an entire page.
Yikes.
Something Swan (my mentor) suggested saved the day- break it up into multiple books. For some reason this hadn’t occurred to me but now I’m so glad because now I get to make not only one super kick ass cool book but a grand total of……..
(drum roll please)
FOUR!!!
There will be one grande book, the mammacita of them all, my official Book of Shadows and then in typical fashion (everything is in triplicate with me) there will be an additional three books that will cover a myriad of topics. (I swear I didn't plan on there being three, it just worked out that way)
I’m in heaven! Sure, it’s immense in scope but realistically I’ll be working on it the rest of my life so I suppose I have time. (Well, let’s hope I do…)
This has all the earmarks of a fantastic project- I LOVE BOOKS firstly, secondly; I love handwritten books- be it books of poetry, journals, whatever, the hand written pages are so much more personal and intimate to me. Thirdly, I get to decorate it!! That means stickers, sparkly wonderfully colored pens, lovely thick colored paper, decorative pages, my very own table of contents…and likely the best part of it all is what Witch is complete without a Book of Shadows?
This is all part of me taking initiative and shaping my identity and thusly my life. Going from thinking about this and longing to do it and actually making it happen feels good too. A lifetime of procrastinating and dreaming has left me with a deficit of actual projects completed and many dashed dreams. I did have to make some sacrifices to find the time for this though, one of them being opting out of participating in the gallery exhibition I was invited to show my paintings at. Oh poo. Oh well. There are only so many hours in the day!
I’ve got all of the chapters outlined, I bought colored card stock from the ever tempting ‘Paper Source’ and made my own lined sheets, I’ve gathered some fantastic stickers & pens & such, my notes and loose papers are all gathered, now all that is left is to begin!
My first step will be transcribing all of my loose papers onto the nice paper and putting them into the appropriate sections of the books. This will be very time consuming yet worth it, I’ve been taking Wicca & Witchcraft classes for nearly two years now so I’ve got gobs of notes that I’d like to organize and keep. Additionally I've wanted to organize my reference papers forever too- herbs, meditation techniques, symbology, Wheel of the Year, Tarot, things of that sort and much much much more.
I'm addicted to crafts and books.
Wheeee!
photo source unknown
Tuesday, August 11, 2009
Friday, August 7, 2009
Part Two
The idea was a lightening bolt shot through my heart.
The idea that there are indeed real healers out there in the world and better yet, accessible to me. While it may seem strange that I believe in magick and yet am skeptical about the existence of bonafide ‘release’ healers I must admit that due to past experience I am skeptical. I’ve seen my fair share of people who profess to be healers, healers of the mind, body and spirit and I’ve not had overwhelmingly positive experiences with them.
I’ve seen acupuncturists that while the therapy might have been successful I was skeptical based on the fact that they don’t have an actual diagnosis they were working from, just a list of complaints. Seems a bit shoddy to me. The real kicker came when I was told that for the therapy to be effective I would have to see her at least once a week if not twice and that each session would be nearly $100.00. Yeah, right. Like I’ve got that kind of money.
The list goes on and on, I won’t bore you with the details. Same goes for psychics. I’ve blown a goodly amount of money there too. Usually they were highly recommended by others and each time I was at a place in my life where I desperately needed guidance, each time I was at a cross roads wondering which path to take. Only once did I ever get any useful information that was actually valid. That particular time was a lady I saw just by chance at a local occultist store. I’ve always wanted to believe, to take a chance on a different route. Every time I just end up feeling like a fool who threw money into the cosmic idiot well.
I’ve read so many testimonials about Solomon that I’m going for it. I’ve got the opportunity to see my mom’s naturopath if this doesn’t work out but if it does it would save me a lot of time and money not to mention restoring my faith in the healing community. One of the things that leads me to think he just might be the real deal is that he doesn’t charge for his services. Yeah, that’s right. Not a dime. You are free to offer a donation but it is in no way solicited or expected I am to understand. He does sell herbs and remedies to support the healing services that he offers but you are free to buy them anywhere you choose. It’s been said additionally that he offers the herbs at cost and does not make a dime on them making them far cheaper than anywhere else.
I’ve had such a good feeling about the whole thing that I was on cloud nine and ready to rush right there and see him, my heart was on board but my brain was doubtful. So I started doing more internet research on him. After much digging and prodding I found my first negative review of Solomon. The writer was not being intentionally cruel towards him but had some scathing reviews of his supposed healing ability. He reported that he and his mother had gone to see him. His mother had been diagnosed with end stage liver disease and was living on dialysis. This was her last ditch effort to be well and live. Solomon told her to get off of the dialysis and to take the recommended herbs and she would get better. The family decided that it was too risky to take her off of dialysis and she too was afraid she would die immediately so they opted to stay on the machine and just take the herbs. The son reported that while the herbs did make her feel much better and improved her quality of life they did not cure her cancer and while she lived much much longer than the doctors had predicted she did eventually pass away. He was bitter and angry that the cancer had not disappeared. She was not spontaneously healed. Okay. So, does this mean he is a sham? The doubt that entered my heart was piercing and my mind screamed “told you so, you fool! You’ll bankrupt us yet!”
After I calmed down a bit and thought about it more I had a dialog with myself about the nature of healing. Now, it would be lovely if we could all die in our sleep after a long peaceful existence. Is that possible? Is it possible in respect to the balance of the universe? Of course not. So obviously some people are not meant to be healed. The trials and tribulations we all go through in this life shape our path. They give meaning to our triumphs.
That said, there are many of us who suffer needlessly from easily cured ills. One of the things that can and will obliterate our health and well-being is FEAR. The woman and her family were afraid of death and so chose not to follow his ‘prescription’ for healing out of fear that it would not work and she would die. So to deny faith and resort to fear are not the best steps to take towards healing.
With these things flushed out in my mind I was back on track and realized that yes, I am willing to take that leap of faith. I have to believe that I can be healed. Every day I ask the Goddess and God to heal me and make me whole. I am willing to do what I have to do. If it isn’t in the cards for me to receive spontaneous healing than I’ll go the long route.
Once again I’m going to reach for the stars and hope that they meet me half way. I’m working towards preparing myself for this healing by honing my meditation skills and detoxing my body. I want to be ready so I can take the ball and run with it when it’s my turn!!
My prayer for everyone reading this is that you are able to find your own personal path towards health, love and light. We all deserve to be happy and healthy. It is our Goddess/God given right.
The idea that there are indeed real healers out there in the world and better yet, accessible to me. While it may seem strange that I believe in magick and yet am skeptical about the existence of bonafide ‘release’ healers I must admit that due to past experience I am skeptical. I’ve seen my fair share of people who profess to be healers, healers of the mind, body and spirit and I’ve not had overwhelmingly positive experiences with them.
I’ve seen acupuncturists that while the therapy might have been successful I was skeptical based on the fact that they don’t have an actual diagnosis they were working from, just a list of complaints. Seems a bit shoddy to me. The real kicker came when I was told that for the therapy to be effective I would have to see her at least once a week if not twice and that each session would be nearly $100.00. Yeah, right. Like I’ve got that kind of money.
The list goes on and on, I won’t bore you with the details. Same goes for psychics. I’ve blown a goodly amount of money there too. Usually they were highly recommended by others and each time I was at a place in my life where I desperately needed guidance, each time I was at a cross roads wondering which path to take. Only once did I ever get any useful information that was actually valid. That particular time was a lady I saw just by chance at a local occultist store. I’ve always wanted to believe, to take a chance on a different route. Every time I just end up feeling like a fool who threw money into the cosmic idiot well.
I’ve read so many testimonials about Solomon that I’m going for it. I’ve got the opportunity to see my mom’s naturopath if this doesn’t work out but if it does it would save me a lot of time and money not to mention restoring my faith in the healing community. One of the things that leads me to think he just might be the real deal is that he doesn’t charge for his services. Yeah, that’s right. Not a dime. You are free to offer a donation but it is in no way solicited or expected I am to understand. He does sell herbs and remedies to support the healing services that he offers but you are free to buy them anywhere you choose. It’s been said additionally that he offers the herbs at cost and does not make a dime on them making them far cheaper than anywhere else.
I’ve had such a good feeling about the whole thing that I was on cloud nine and ready to rush right there and see him, my heart was on board but my brain was doubtful. So I started doing more internet research on him. After much digging and prodding I found my first negative review of Solomon. The writer was not being intentionally cruel towards him but had some scathing reviews of his supposed healing ability. He reported that he and his mother had gone to see him. His mother had been diagnosed with end stage liver disease and was living on dialysis. This was her last ditch effort to be well and live. Solomon told her to get off of the dialysis and to take the recommended herbs and she would get better. The family decided that it was too risky to take her off of dialysis and she too was afraid she would die immediately so they opted to stay on the machine and just take the herbs. The son reported that while the herbs did make her feel much better and improved her quality of life they did not cure her cancer and while she lived much much longer than the doctors had predicted she did eventually pass away. He was bitter and angry that the cancer had not disappeared. She was not spontaneously healed. Okay. So, does this mean he is a sham? The doubt that entered my heart was piercing and my mind screamed “told you so, you fool! You’ll bankrupt us yet!”
After I calmed down a bit and thought about it more I had a dialog with myself about the nature of healing. Now, it would be lovely if we could all die in our sleep after a long peaceful existence. Is that possible? Is it possible in respect to the balance of the universe? Of course not. So obviously some people are not meant to be healed. The trials and tribulations we all go through in this life shape our path. They give meaning to our triumphs.
That said, there are many of us who suffer needlessly from easily cured ills. One of the things that can and will obliterate our health and well-being is FEAR. The woman and her family were afraid of death and so chose not to follow his ‘prescription’ for healing out of fear that it would not work and she would die. So to deny faith and resort to fear are not the best steps to take towards healing.
With these things flushed out in my mind I was back on track and realized that yes, I am willing to take that leap of faith. I have to believe that I can be healed. Every day I ask the Goddess and God to heal me and make me whole. I am willing to do what I have to do. If it isn’t in the cards for me to receive spontaneous healing than I’ll go the long route.
Once again I’m going to reach for the stars and hope that they meet me half way. I’m working towards preparing myself for this healing by honing my meditation skills and detoxing my body. I want to be ready so I can take the ball and run with it when it’s my turn!!
My prayer for everyone reading this is that you are able to find your own personal path towards health, love and light. We all deserve to be happy and healthy. It is our Goddess/God given right.
Thursday, August 6, 2009
Hope for Healing, part one
I bought plane tickets yesterday.
My brightest hope is that I will forever remember this trip as the day that changed my life. I am going to see a healer this September. Now, it's a long complicated dialog that I had with myself and it's likely anyone else faced with this information would find themselves struggling just as I did. Well, let me begin at the beginning before I rush to the end.
Like pretty much everyone I know I have a pile of health problems. I believe that mine really started with birth control. The pill wasn't so hard on me, I may have started on it a little early and who knows what that does to a young girl but I digress. It was the depo-provera shot that really did a number on me. I was only on it for roughly two years but it took an additional 4 years to get it all out of my system and start feeling 'normal' again. The problem is that I believe the balances had been tipped internally and since I never took specific action to rectify that my problems have continued they've just been a little more mysterious and not necessarily hormone related.
I've given up going to 'western' doctors with my list of ills, I've not gotten anywhere that way. I won't go into my tirade about western doctors and the issue I take with treating symptoms (largely with pharmaceuticals) and not the actual root cause. I believe that route is dangerous, costly and highly ineffectual. I've always looked to homeopathy for my cures and have had success with little things here and there. The problem is I don't know what the root cause of my suffering is. I've searched for a reputable naturopath and reluctantly admit to having seen one who I feel knew a bit about it, did help me a little bit but ultimately did not perform the panel of tests necessary to truly detect the deepest root cause for my maladies. I spent hundreds and hundreds of dollars on vitamins and herbs and while I did feel better I wasn't able to keep up with roughly 15 vitamins three times a day. With assorted teas that I was required to drink all day too. I know the natural healing path is a long and often slow one and ultimately I am willing to walk that path if that is what it takes to heal my body and MOVE ON.
Now I know a bit more about it and now I know that before the buying of the stuff there needs to be saliva testing, blood tests, kineseology, things of that nature. The problem with that is that I am not really able to afford all of that. For the first time in a very long time I have a job that provides health insurance but of course they do not pay for any of this since it's through a naturopath.
While it's important for me to get better really any way you shake it there is added pressure due to the fact that I think we're going to look at getting pregnant in December. I know that I NEED to get my health sorted out before we try again because I can't help but think that it is because of my health problems that we lost the last baby. I don't ever want to go through that again. It was a late term miscarriage which is more rare and the doctors weren't able to find anything wrong with the baby so I believe it was because of me. Of course like everyone we want to have a healthy baby and I know that if I am able to get myself put back together first we'll have much better chances of that.
I've begun cutting out all products that are not organic to reduce our exposure to chemicals. That means deodorant, shampoo & conditioner, lotions, soaps, cleaning products, anything that has SLS (sodium lauryl sulfate) and other scary things. I've also started to get strict about cooking as opposed to eating microwave entrees for nearly every meal. We got started on that because we can count the calories and it was less work but ultimately we ended up getting spoiled by the convenience while our bodies suffer with chemical, preservative laden foods. So we're detoxing and really working on changing our lifestyle.
My mom has been seeing a naturopath where she lives and she's convinced he knows what's up. He had her do all the tests and scientifically was able to figure out what was causing her ills and has begun to facilitate healing. She's very happy with the results. She healed up from a major surgery in record time thanks to his intervention in her post-op protocol. Okay, so this is where it gets interesting, the doctor that she is seeing has a receptionist who my mom started hanging out with- nice lady. One day my parents are hanging out with her and her husband and the subject of a nerve problem my dad was just diagnosed with came up. The husband says to his wife, "have you told them about Solomon?" and she replied with a red face "no, I haven't....I don't tell many people about Solomon." Well, naturally my parent's curiosity was peaked and they prompted her to just go ahead and tell them and they would listen with an open mind. The story that they told my parents is the reason I am flying to Auburn, Indiana in September.
In Amish country, specifically Auburn, Indiana there is a Amish man named Solomon Wickey. He has been reputed to be a magnificent healer. He is a master Herbalist, a kinesiology practitioner as well as an iridology practitioner. Above that though he is a "release" healer. In a release, which requires spirituality and a basic faith in God, hands are laid on the ill person and the affliction is “released out of the body.” Okay, so this is where it gets a little far out, right?
The couple went on to tell my parent's that the man had been afflicted with horrible pain in his knees his whole life. Since childhood he'd had to deal with the pain, swelling and lack of mobility. Doctors suggested surgery but weren't able to provide him with good enough odds to outweigh the risks and the cost so he figured he'd just have to live with it. That is until a friend of his found out about and saw a healer named Solomon. And so they left to visit him and see for themselves if he could heal his knee problems. He was told that his problems arose from improperly formed hips. He had him lay down as he moved his hands around above his body. After a bit he told him, "okay, you are fine now, you can go." The man didn't really understand and asked him, "well, so what do I need to take and what do I need to do?" Solomon's reply was, "nothing. You are healed. " And sure enough, when he rose and begun to walk he immediately noticed that the pain was gone. It hasn't returned since.
That got my attention.
To be continued.....
My brightest hope is that I will forever remember this trip as the day that changed my life. I am going to see a healer this September. Now, it's a long complicated dialog that I had with myself and it's likely anyone else faced with this information would find themselves struggling just as I did. Well, let me begin at the beginning before I rush to the end.
Like pretty much everyone I know I have a pile of health problems. I believe that mine really started with birth control. The pill wasn't so hard on me, I may have started on it a little early and who knows what that does to a young girl but I digress. It was the depo-provera shot that really did a number on me. I was only on it for roughly two years but it took an additional 4 years to get it all out of my system and start feeling 'normal' again. The problem is that I believe the balances had been tipped internally and since I never took specific action to rectify that my problems have continued they've just been a little more mysterious and not necessarily hormone related.
I've given up going to 'western' doctors with my list of ills, I've not gotten anywhere that way. I won't go into my tirade about western doctors and the issue I take with treating symptoms (largely with pharmaceuticals) and not the actual root cause. I believe that route is dangerous, costly and highly ineffectual. I've always looked to homeopathy for my cures and have had success with little things here and there. The problem is I don't know what the root cause of my suffering is. I've searched for a reputable naturopath and reluctantly admit to having seen one who I feel knew a bit about it, did help me a little bit but ultimately did not perform the panel of tests necessary to truly detect the deepest root cause for my maladies. I spent hundreds and hundreds of dollars on vitamins and herbs and while I did feel better I wasn't able to keep up with roughly 15 vitamins three times a day. With assorted teas that I was required to drink all day too. I know the natural healing path is a long and often slow one and ultimately I am willing to walk that path if that is what it takes to heal my body and MOVE ON.
Now I know a bit more about it and now I know that before the buying of the stuff there needs to be saliva testing, blood tests, kineseology, things of that nature. The problem with that is that I am not really able to afford all of that. For the first time in a very long time I have a job that provides health insurance but of course they do not pay for any of this since it's through a naturopath.
While it's important for me to get better really any way you shake it there is added pressure due to the fact that I think we're going to look at getting pregnant in December. I know that I NEED to get my health sorted out before we try again because I can't help but think that it is because of my health problems that we lost the last baby. I don't ever want to go through that again. It was a late term miscarriage which is more rare and the doctors weren't able to find anything wrong with the baby so I believe it was because of me. Of course like everyone we want to have a healthy baby and I know that if I am able to get myself put back together first we'll have much better chances of that.
I've begun cutting out all products that are not organic to reduce our exposure to chemicals. That means deodorant, shampoo & conditioner, lotions, soaps, cleaning products, anything that has SLS (sodium lauryl sulfate) and other scary things. I've also started to get strict about cooking as opposed to eating microwave entrees for nearly every meal. We got started on that because we can count the calories and it was less work but ultimately we ended up getting spoiled by the convenience while our bodies suffer with chemical, preservative laden foods. So we're detoxing and really working on changing our lifestyle.
My mom has been seeing a naturopath where she lives and she's convinced he knows what's up. He had her do all the tests and scientifically was able to figure out what was causing her ills and has begun to facilitate healing. She's very happy with the results. She healed up from a major surgery in record time thanks to his intervention in her post-op protocol. Okay, so this is where it gets interesting, the doctor that she is seeing has a receptionist who my mom started hanging out with- nice lady. One day my parents are hanging out with her and her husband and the subject of a nerve problem my dad was just diagnosed with came up. The husband says to his wife, "have you told them about Solomon?" and she replied with a red face "no, I haven't....I don't tell many people about Solomon." Well, naturally my parent's curiosity was peaked and they prompted her to just go ahead and tell them and they would listen with an open mind. The story that they told my parents is the reason I am flying to Auburn, Indiana in September.
In Amish country, specifically Auburn, Indiana there is a Amish man named Solomon Wickey. He has been reputed to be a magnificent healer. He is a master Herbalist, a kinesiology practitioner as well as an iridology practitioner. Above that though he is a "release" healer. In a release, which requires spirituality and a basic faith in God, hands are laid on the ill person and the affliction is “released out of the body.” Okay, so this is where it gets a little far out, right?
The couple went on to tell my parent's that the man had been afflicted with horrible pain in his knees his whole life. Since childhood he'd had to deal with the pain, swelling and lack of mobility. Doctors suggested surgery but weren't able to provide him with good enough odds to outweigh the risks and the cost so he figured he'd just have to live with it. That is until a friend of his found out about and saw a healer named Solomon. And so they left to visit him and see for themselves if he could heal his knee problems. He was told that his problems arose from improperly formed hips. He had him lay down as he moved his hands around above his body. After a bit he told him, "okay, you are fine now, you can go." The man didn't really understand and asked him, "well, so what do I need to take and what do I need to do?" Solomon's reply was, "nothing. You are healed. " And sure enough, when he rose and begun to walk he immediately noticed that the pain was gone. It hasn't returned since.
That got my attention.
To be continued.....
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