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Showing posts with label poetry. Show all posts
Showing posts with label poetry. Show all posts

Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Blah blah blah

Hello all~

I've been avoiding this blog because I've been dealing with piles of health issues and haven't had the energy to come up with something else to bring to the table. Well, I'm going to make more of an effort, I've recently got some things cleared up and with some positive MRI test results I'm feeling more like poking my head out of my shell.  But tonight, tonight you get poetry.  You love the poetry, right?  It's like sex for your eyes & brains!  Word sex! 

lie still, tiny mouth.
lie still, mouth from which eternity will speak. tiny tongue
that will soon summon the dead,
that will define grace, that
will silence our foolishness.
Rosebud lips- upon which ride
a starborn kiss of forgiveness
to those who believe you, and of
death to those who deny you-
                               lie still.
excerpt of piece by Max Lucado

Saturday, January 29, 2011

Lascivite


Lucifer for Agent Provocateur

 Take me back rocket through
the miles missing you
is delicious the taste
of anticipation smooth
the ripple release the soul
bound by the ecstasy moan

murdering words whispered
diving headlong towards inception
raised by ritual
driven by salacious hunger
hunting, the sharp teeth
slick tongue disguises
opulent ancestral lust
release
release
going deep

dreams of saturnalia
     consumption
chasm abandon the ashes
in your wake sharpened to
fine point desire
arching estrus you see
every pulse invading
your consciousness, nearly wise
intended saiety
I can see you will
not be denied

lull, lull, lull the lust
swallow the release
bury it deep
gloss the surface
quiet the drums

unfastened contortion
prison the severed
wings unbalance
and knot my cruelest curse my
beast heart (tear
empty wake) it's getting
harder and harder
to separate
myself
these days.

~Esmeralda~

Friday, March 6, 2009

Takin' Some Time

I keep telling myself I've got far far too many other things I should be doing instead of writing on this blog but y'know what? I never write anymore. Not just here, but anywhere. No journaling. No poetry. No fiction. It sucks. And frankly I don't feel up to writing anywhere else so I'm going to do a little rambling here.

Bear with me as I muse about weddings.

I'm getting married in April. Pretty soon huh? Don't I know it.

Early on people (firstly my mom of course) told me to "be careful, weddings take on a life of their own, don't let this one become a beast!" I scoffed. (Yeah, I'm a scoffer ;)

Foolishly I thought, "not me, not my wedding. I'm going to keep it simple and under control."

Riiiiiiiggght.

The problem has not been outside pressure or an urge to please others, no disagreements between my fiance and myself. My problem is simply.....me. At first I was going super duper simple. No favors. No chair covers/sashes. I'll take the cake they offer for free and not really care what it looks like. On and on.

As time wore on I became increasingly inspired. Doesn't sound like a bad thing but trust me when I say inspired (for me) is anything but simple. I became obsessed with the centerpieces. The only decoration we are doing is the tables. We aren't doing any special lighting, no big floral arrangements, just tables. So in my mind they needed to be utterly spectacular tables. How to create spectacular tables on a very tight budget? That was my mission. Well, the one thing that didn't change in the end is that we aren't hanging any special decorative lighting and we still aren't doing any big floral arrangements.

We are however not taking their cake, I saw pictures and it's just poop. I was shocked at how bad it looked, really. Anywho, we found a great lady who is going to make us a fabulous cake. A cake I still have to desing... We scored free chair covers out of the deal since the cake was part of the package price we traded it for nice white chair covers. I saw their chairs. Lame. They are a dark maroon color when the drapes and color palette is all dark green and cream. Weird. Our wedding colors are a bright chartreuse green & crisp white. (Incidentally those are the colors of my dress as well, ;~)

I went around and around with myself on the tables looking for just the right thing to spark THE VISION. I wish I had a meter on the Internet at work & home so I could see just how many hours I scoured the web. There is a staggering amount of shit on the web that is related to weddings. It's no shit that it is a 40-70 BILLION dollar a year industry. Numbers are shaky hence the huge gap but there are so many independent people who own shops or work out of their homes that do not contribute to the statistics that it's hard to get an accurate account. It's reported that the average wedding in the U.S. costs $28,000.00.

Hard to believe. The only person I know that even comes close to that number is someone I work with who said her wedding came in at about $25,000.00. Not including the honeymoon. Most people I know don't even come remotely close to that number but I don't doubt that it's possible.

Selling fairy tales is a big business. Selling status is an even bigger one.

I worked some weddings at the country club I used to slave for that were re-dic-ulous. Waaay over the top. Whateva. It's not my thing but don't get the idea that I look down on others who do it that way, to each their own. I would rather spend my money on stuff to do while I'm there.

It looks like I'm actually going to make my predicted budget of $5-6,000.00 . It is a destination wedding, so of course it's going to be a little spendy. But that's why we waited so long so that we could be in a position to do it the way we always dreamed. Tropical. Vacation with all of our close friends and family. Oh yeah.

Okay, so I should quit crying but this really has turned into such a fiasco. Ultimately the tables are going to be a vision. I've received most of the stuff that will be going on the tables and it's all divine. I'll post pics of the reception, promise.

I had a moment of divine inspiration for the tables. It was weird, it came to me in a flash and it was completely perfect, completely me, completely unique. Somewhere along the line I decided that I didn't really want a simple no frills wedding because in the end what I am doing is throwing a party for myself, for him and for all of our friends and family and dammit, I'm going to show them how it's done! (he he he) I've always enjoyed throwing people birthday parties, being the hostess is a tough job but pretty damn fun too. And because I did log in all those hours I was able to get some pretty sweet deals on everything. I haven't paid full price for anything yet except my dress, his clothes and the flowers.

That said, I'm so tired of planning. I just want the fun part to start already. I can't imagine those brave souls that have hundreds of guests. I've got 30 and it's a bit much. Then again, the most stressful part has been handling every one's lodging for the week. Asking people for $$$$ is never fun. Having to demand it because they won't adhere to deadlines is double not fun.

Soon it will all be worth it. I just keep looking at the pictures I've got in my head.

Oh, and I'm two sizes smaller now thanks to spending half my life at the gym. It's worth it though, there's just no freakin' short cuts to getting slim and feeling better. Damn it. It's true.

On a side note:
Anyone down with Poetry Daily? There is some inspired work on this site.
http://poems.com/

How 'bout Verse Daily?
http://www.versedaily.org/index.shtml

That's my little poetry nudge.

~Peace out~


~Blessings~